Hey Tovarisch, er, Comrade! Just got a letter from a buddy of mine who laments that paradigmatic train wreck that he thinks is before us.
He feels bad because the USSA, er, America is about to become socialized. Think about it. Don't you think that "social" people are nicer? Aren't they more thoughtful? More caring?
Why not let Uncle take care of you? You're not really capable of doing it on your own anyway. You're just not that good at being an adult. Who wouldn't want to go back to being a child anyway? Ah, those carefree days. Remember them?
Face it. You're just not capable or responsible enough. Besides, you'll miss "The View" if you got a job. If it was a night job, "Desperate Housewives" would have to wait.
I know what you're saying - "I have cable and TiVo so I'll catch all my shows regardless." But hey. Who has the time to do both?
Yup. Evil Corporations. I know you have parents and grandparents that say "It is my 401K!" But remember, those retirement accounts are invested heavily with Evil Corporations (aka "the Man"). Don't buy their argument. Anyways, Uncle will take care of them.
Have you ever watched crabs in a boiling pot? No, because that is unusual punishment and crabs are people too. But...if you have, you'll notice that any crab that is close to getting out will be pulled down by the other crabs stuck in the pot. Hey, it's only fair. Why should one get out of the mess. Every single crab should be in the same boat (or hot water). That is all the government wants to do - everyone should suffer equally. It's the American way. It is so universal that we should have people from every shithole, er, nation of significant superior, nature-loving people to come here, legal or not, and join the bandwagon of crabs in the pot. It will be a party.
But here is the bottom line: If you do not vote for Him, you're a racist. No, no, no. I can hear you arguing that he's has "questionable" affiliations. Whether it is a Palestinian terror supporter who wants to destroy Israel or a true-blue(state) American bomber who has blood on his hands, he was a kid when that hap... okay so he supported the Palestinian guy was while in the Senate, who cares? He didn't set any bombs. He just thinks that is must be okay. Free speech, ya know.
It doesn't matter if you're against socialism, you're a racist. You don't like th...you're a racist. The tax issu...you're a racist. You 're bla...you're a rac...Tom.
Remember, we're watching.
